The Twilight Series: So Sexy Wrong

Below is a review I wrote for the first book of the series:

Twilight's a quick read, but it feels specifically calculated to make females lose their minds. It's no wonder this book is found in the hands of nearly every woman waiting to board their flights in airports around the world. It's a chick flick in novel form, multiplied by teenage angst, to the power of annoying redundancy. I mean, I GET IT, he's beautiful! Get on with it already. The references to the object of obsession’s beautiful features, his hard body, and his hypnotizing scent go on and on. They are squeezed into nearly every other paragraph in case the audience had a lapse of concentration the last time it was mentioned.

So, you ask, "Why is this book such a huge success?" There are bits of it that are appealing: the Romeo & Juliet-esque romance, the sexual tension, and it stirs the kind (or cruel, depending on your particular experience) memory of first love and/or lust. Girls are generally attracted to men that make them feel protected, men that are interested in who they are, men that only have eyes for one woman, men that smell good, and men that are "beautiful". The male character is all of those things, and women eat it up because he is crafted by the author as every woman's perfect man. It's genius on her part, and the millions she's raked in is obvious proof. (Grade: C)

OK, I gave it a terrible review, but the funny (or sad) part is that I continued with the second, third, and fourth book. If that were not enough, I bought the boxed set in secret because I knew I would be subject to ridicule if my boyfriend found out. Here, in an effort to redeem (or further embarrass) myself, are my reasons (aka excuses) for moving forward with the series:

1.) I saw the movie. It was far from great, but Robert Pattinson won me over with his face (bloke on the right).

2.) The chapters are titled obviously enough so that I knew which ones to skip over. Any chapters that didn't have vampires in them were skimmed, and any chapters that specifically concentrated on a werewolf named Jacob were entirely skipped over.

3.) I liked reading about what I call the "sexy wrong". She wants him even though she knows it's dangerous, and she pushes her boundaries to persuade him to get "intercoursical" with her. He responds with something like, "I want to but I can't because I might want you too much, and I may end up killing you." Now THAT is sexy wrong!

4.) I wanted to know if he would eventually do it with her.

5.) I was on winter break and I needed reading material to pass the time.

My recommendation:

Twilight would certainly not be the first book or series I would recommend to any female, teenage or otherwise, but if you have the time to read about vampire sexiness I do have a few recommendations.

Read the first book to understand what it's about, read the summaries for the 2nd and 3rd books because they're really not worth reading (but read the last 4 chapters of each), and read the 4th book because it is filled with vampire sexiness. If you're interested, I have the books on pdf. A sad revelation, but true none-the-less.

Attractive actors you might actually have a chance with because they're not really famous yet..

This blog was inspired by the 30 Rock marathon I had a few days ago. There was an episode called "The Hair and The Head." The guy that played "The Hair" was fairly good looking and I thought, "Oooh man. If I ever had a chance with an actor, it'd be with him cause he's not famous yet!" Don't ask me how I figured that one out, but for some reason I think that the less famous a person is, the more likely it would be for that person to fall madly in love with me. Also, it would be less likely for them to land movies with hot boyfriend-stealing actresses. Anyway, to the ladies and gay men that read this blog, I provide you with some pictures of actors who aren't quite famous yet, but are pretty easy on the eyes:

Exhibit A: Charlie Hunnam (Green Street Hooligans, Undeclared, Sons of Anarchy)



He has a pretty face, but it's his accent that gets me. Oooh that British accent will be the death of me one day!


Exhibit B: Val Emmich (Ugly Betty, 30 Rock)


That dimple just kills me.

I'm sure there are tons of other attractive, fairly unknown, actors out there. I invite you to enlighten me.

Duck picture, a welcome to 2009, and photoshoot fun..

Oh GEMMA!:

Here are the rules:
1. Take a picture of yourself.. riiiiiight.. NOW!
2. DO NOT change your clothes. DO NOT fix your hair.. Just take a picture.
3. Post that picture with NO editing.
4. Post these instructions with your picture.
5. Tag 10 people to do this and leave their pics as a comment (or email me or post on your own blog)!


This picture is courtesy of Gemma. Thanks A LOT! haha. I initially intended for this blog to be about the New Year, and my new goals, but the rules called for a picture to be taken RIGHT NOW.

Some time ago I saw a duck towel at Pottery Barn Kids, and I've always wanted one. This year, on my birthday, I finally got one! I normally use it more as a half blanket instead of a towel, and on this particular morning there is dorky evidence of it posted on the internet. Again, thanks Gemma.



Goals for 2009:

In 2008 I wrote the following goals: Go to Europe, finish my stupid thesis, keep up this blog, write more songs, do more gigs, stress less, go skydiving. I am lucky enough to have gone to Europe in 2008. I also had my research approved, kept up this blog, written more songs, and performed at some gigs. I'm canceling out sky diving since I added that goal mid-year, and I failed at stressing less. Maternity and Pediatrics kicked my butt this past semester, and I have to admit there was quite a bit of stressing. Although, I did stress less about things outside of school which is a huge improvement.

Now, I reveal to you, my goals for 2009:

Graduate
Visit a foreign country (UK or Australia maybe?)
Learn to play the ukulele
Lose 10 pounds
Use my bike at least once a week (after rainy season)
Use my camera more


My Brother:

Just for the heck of it my brother and I went to the Berkeley dock, and I took some pictures. I love my camera. It does the job, but I think I'll upgrade within the year.

oOoh Vegas...

It was a successfully fun trip to Vegas. It was great to see my buddies from my Eurotrip again. While I had a great time hanging out, my feet are still punishing me from the hours of trekking up and down the strip, and the walking on heels. It was freezing cold in Vegas. We nearly missed all the fun and excitement due to the snow. The Vegas airport was closed the day before our flight was schedule to leave, but thankfully the snow melted away by the following day and off we went.

There were a lot of shenanigans, shopping, and cracking up over our 3.5 day stay in Vegas. We stayed with our friend Emily who lives in Vegas, and she took us EVERYWHERE. We partied it up at Hard Rock, hung around the outlets, saw a Mystere, "built" a gingerbread house, and spent some time on Fremont. Fun times.


I consider these to be the highlights of the trip:


Richard Macdonald Exhibit

We tried to grab some tickets to watch O, but O wasn't playing until after Christmas. We saw Mystere instead. On our way to grabbing tickets, we came upon an exhibit by Richard Macdonald. I have never been the type to say, "Oh yeah, that's worth the ridiculous amount of dollars they're charging," but in this case, I really did feel that the pieces of art were worth it. I was blown away. It was absolutely beautiful.


Gingerbread House Building

OK, I was only there for half of the process, but it was still fun. Five people failed at something that should have taken one person to put together. My friend Emily put the very same model together with some 5 year olds. How hilariously sad for us.







Mystere

I would have to say that I liked Kooza a bit more than Mystere. Mystere is supposed to be the first of the Cirque Du Soleil shows, and it seems that the producers have significantly built upon the original, but it was still entertaining. There were bits and pieces of it that were just beautiful.






Hanging out with friends

Of course this was the best part of the trip! It's always fun to hang out with crazy friends. Memorable bits:

1. "WHY SO SERIOUS?" - Drunk Jenn
2. Drunk sprinting Christine
3. Henley

Relief, random gigs, partying with nurses, and other post-finals randomness

Relief:

I am through with this semester. Thank heavens! It was the most text heavy semester by far. There was a lot of work, and a lot of stress, but it's over. That's a total of 2 ATI's, 9 exams, 1 stupid boring concert, 1 research proposal, 1 thesis lit review, 8-9 care plans, and countless hours of reading and dollars spent at Starbucks.

Random Gigs:

Audiology had a last minute gig put together, with the help of my friend George, in North Beach last Thursday. It had to have been one of the most random gigs we've done to date. We were the house band for an amateur comedian night at Grant & Green. The comedians were NOT funny. It was so UNfunny, in fact, that it turned out to be quite hilarious, just on accident. Some of the comedians got mad at us for not laughing, but we really tried! There was a certain point in the evening where everything was funny though. At least we received free drinks as the house band for the night, so that was enjoyable.

Partying with nurses:

After all the craziness of finals and Audiology's random gig, I headed to Poleng to party with some awesome future nurses. I don't think I've seen that many nurses in one place, and that includes lectures. It was a blast! With the free drinks from Grant & Green added to the drinks at Poleng, the following morning did not turn out to be nearly as fun.




Other Randomness:

After a gig on Saturday, I went to hang out with some friends I don't get to see very much. It was my friend Marie's daughter's christening/1st birthday party, and it was a good excuse to get everyone together. It turns out, all my friends who are well into their 20s are still kids. We played glow in the dark miniature golf, stole tokens that were intended for the smaller children so we can play ski-ball and the like, and I was also an accessory to an arcade crime (Noel and his girlfriend found a game where tickets would just continually come out if you pulled at it. They totaled nearly 3000 tickets at the end). I saw this at the glass case with all the prizes in it, and thought about how inappropriately funny it was: